“Refrain from anger
and forsake wrath. Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil.” Psalm 37:8
Definitely talking to myself here. I am a bad tempered Irish
chick and it shows. I get angry easily, and I do not let it go for a long time.
If you get me mad, you will know it.
And half the time I’ll misdirect it too. If I can’t take it
out on who I want to, it overflows onto my friends and family. (God bless them
for putting up with me.)
I’m not going to make any excuses. This is wrong. I know it,
and I am trying to learn.
It’s not so much the emotion of anger that is wrong. I can’t
control when that enters my mind. However what I can control is how I react.
And that is where I go wrong. When I’m angry, I don’t control it or take care
of it. I let it build out until it spills out, normally onto someone who
doesn’t deserve it.
Verses throughout the bible show how we should be in regards
to our anger:
“Be angry and do not
sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger.” Ephesians 4:26
It doesn’t say we can’t be angered, but it does tell us not
to sin in that anger. This verse also tells us not to hold a grudge. We
shouldn’t even let it last to the end of the day. We should handle it as it
comes and not let it build.
“Know this, my beloved
brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger, for
the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” James 1:19-20
We shouldn’t snap the moment someone says something that may
offend us or does anything we don’t like. It tells us that our anger will not
make us the people God desires us to be. We will not produce the fruit of
righteousness if we dwell in anger.
“”Good sense makes one
slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.” Proverbs 19:11
Again- we should be slow to anger. That is what is sensible.
It is considered a wise man’s glory to overlook an offense. It doesn’t mean it is easy to
overlook or that you won’t want to respond, but it is good to just let it go.
“Be not quick in your
spirit to become angry, for anger lodges in the hearts of fools.” Ecclesiastes
7:9
I’m going to point out that Ecclesiastes was written by Solomon,
who was considered to be the wisest man the world has ever known. He knows
much, and he says that anger is in the heart of fools. It is not for those who
seek after God.
“A hot-tempered man
stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.” Proverbs 15:18
“Whoever is slow to
anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes
a city.” Proverbs 16:32
In both of these verses, I have seen other translations that
translate “slow to anger” as “patient”. Part of being level headed and slow to
anger is being patient and calm (Another issue of mine).
The patient man can calm quarrels between people, and it
says he is better than one who takes a city- better than that mighty man who
many respect.
“Whoever is slow to
anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly.”
Proverbs 14:29
The parallels are once again drawn between a patient man having
wisdom (understanding) and an angry man being a fool (folly). It becomes pretty
clear throughout the scriptures that God wants us to be patient and slow to
anger.
There are many other verses that tie into this, but I will
leave it at those. I think God’s point about our anger is pretty obvious.
It’s a struggle, certainly. I strive every day to overcome my
temper and to be patient. I am definitely still working on it. It doesn’t
happen instantly with a quick prayer to make it go away.
I’ve seen in my prayer life that when I pray for patience, God
doesn’t instantly give it to me, He gives me opportunities to be patient and I
learn through those how to be patient. When I pray for my temper to be
controlled, He gives me things that ordinarily would make me mad so that I can
learn to control it.
He has already given us the tool we need to learn these
things- the Holy Spirit. If we are in Him, the Spirit can teach us to be
patient and controlled as long as we listen, and don’t quench it (Therein lies
my problem).
Learning to be controlled as God instructs us to be is a
process. That’s for sure. However it is possible with His assistance. So don’t
give up.
And just listen to Him. He’ll help you if you let Him.
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